Interview with Molly, supporter of same-sex marriage

I interviewed my best friend, Molly. I thought she would be a great person to interview because not only one, but two members of her family, are gay. She has had to deal with people's opinions all her life and she feels that she would not be the person that she is today if she had not had the experience of having gay family members.

1) Do you feel that the issue of same-sex marriage is a problem that is important in our society? Why/Why not? Absolutely. It affects not just gays and lesbians, but everyone and society as a whole. I believe in the equal rights for everyone, not just heterosexuals. I am an active member of the HRC (Human Rights Campaign) and fully support same-sex marriage being legalized nationwide. I don't care who you want to marry, and honestly - other people should not either.

2) Do you think others in our community this is an important problem? Why/Why not? I think that not enough people are as supportive as they should be. I feel that a lot of people will not be vocal about supporting same-sex marriage. There are also way too many people who are close-minded and do not think it is something that should be allowed. In my experience, those people are ultra conservative or very religious. In my opinion, hating someone because of their sexuality is pure ignorance.

3) What policy, if any, does government now have to deal with this problem? There is the problem of separation of church and state. The problem right now is that same-sex marriage is only recognized on a state level. It should be made legal on a nationwide level. If a couple is legally married in Massachusetts, their marriage should also be legal in every other state. It does not matter what the church has to say about it. It should not be a factor of supporting the rights of others.

4) Why are you in support of same-sex marriage? I grew up in a home with a father who ended up being gay. It was just something that was never talked about. My mother (who has since passed away) and my father were best friends. During the time period when they got married (in the 1960s) being homosexual wasn't accepted like it is today.They had a very friendly separation. My father suppressed his feelings into his adulthood and finally through years of therapy was able finally accept who he really is. My younger brother is also gay. I strongly believe there is some sort of genetic connection somewhere along the lines that leads to sexual orientation. My brother was very fortunate to have a family that supported him coming out and being gay from an early age. He is very well adjusted and very open about his sexuality.

5) What are advantages of the policy of allowing same-sex marriages? There are so many advantages it's hard to list them all. Equality for men and women, not just heterosexuals. Being able to marry who you love without the government or church telling you it's wrong. Also, being able to adopt children or have the same benefits that a husband and wife have are important.

6) What are disadvantages of this policy? If I really had to come up with a disadvantage is that it would be met with an enormous amount of criticism by certain groups.

7) How might the policy be improved? I strongly believe that same-sex marriage should be legal on the Federal level, not just the state level.

8) What disagreements, if any, about the policy of same-sex marriage exist in society? There are hundreds I can think of. People say that allowing gays to marry is destroying the "institution" of marriage. I feel that with the divorce rate higher than ever, this is a ridiculous argument. Marriage has become a joke for too many people. Many believe that homosexuality is morally wrong or goes against the Bible. However, homosexuality has been around for thousands of years...even in the earliest civilizations there were documentation of homosexuality. It is a recurring theme in classic literature. The writer Sappho was born on the island of Lesbos in the 7th century and her work focused on love and passion for both genders. In fact, the word "lesbian" comes from the word Lesbos, her homeplace.

9) Where can I get more information about this problem and the different positions people take on this problem? There are tons of websites that are helpful. I do a lot of work with HRC (www.hrc.org). If people want to educate themselves on same-sex marriage and the debate there is a great site at http://www.arguingequality.org/ The most important thing that people can do is educate themselves!

10) Any other comments? It's just so important that we treat human beings the same that we would want to be treated. There is no reason to teach children to hate others based on their personal values or beliefs. Let's start working on ourselves instead of judging what other people are doing.

Reflection:

I completely and totally support same-sex marriage. I have best friends who are homosexuals and I couldn't care less who they love or want to marry. Honestly, I find it strange that this is SUCH a hot topic and the center of so much debate. I think that people need to "clean up their own yards" (meaning their personal business) before getting involved in what their neighbors are doing. I actually don't see how it affects anyone if two men want get to married or two women get married. I am passionate about this subject. I gave a presentation on allowing same-sex couples to adopt children in my public speaking class.

I have known Molly for 17 years now. I have been with her through ups and downs and was there when her father came out and told them all that he was gay. I saw what happened to her family, and how he was ridiculed by long time family friends. It is not easy, and I can't imagine that anyone would choose this for their lives or for their children. I stand by my belief that homosexuality is something you are either born with or not. We do not learn how to love, and we do not choose who we love.